I was saddened tonight when I watched a news report about two parents grieving over their son who had been bullied so much that he ended his life in 8th grade. They said that they talked to the school about it, but the school didn't listen. It went on for 2 years. TWO YEARS??? My son was slightly picked on and his teacher nipped it by the next week. I can't imagine dealing with a broken child for two years. I ache for them.
Something I will never forget, is the advice from Dr. James Dobson in Bringing Up Boys. He suggests that if you and your child have done everything you can to end bullying, and it doesn't stop, and your child's spirit is obviously broken, then pull him out. There is always an alternative place. Whether it be homeschool, or a different school district. I know people who have done this, and have seen amazing differences in their child. It's not wimpy and teaching your child they can't fight for themselves. It is something that must be done if your child no longer has the will to fight...or the will to live. There is no reason a child should ever have the torment of bullies break them so badly that they are no longer themselves.
Something this child in the news report was being picked on for, was his clothes. This, my lovely American culture, is absolutely absurd! I had the privilege to go to public British schools from 2nd to 6th grade, and wore uniforms. My insecurities about how I looked only came up when I was around my "American school" friends, and once we came back to the States. Lax dress code is when shallow classification began, and stress about how much to spend on clothes entered our family.
Friends, please remember the last words I heard this grieving mom say tonight- "Look past the "I'm fines"." Don't push aside your instincts if your child is showing signs of bullying but doesn't want to talk about it. It's YOUR job to protect them, YOU, the parent, are your child's only advocate!
So sad. I agree with all that you said here!
ReplyDeleteIt is sad. As a mother of seven I've had to go through this at one time or another but nothing really serious.
ReplyDeleteFollowing from the nestwork.
Tomica
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