"Unless you people see signs and wonders, you simply will not believe."John 4:48
Imagine Jesus, the Savior of the world, standing in front of you and saying this. I can almost see and hear Him now. He probably laughed and threw His hands up in the air, shook His head, and said it in a baffled tone.
But you know what? However He said it, He cared enough for those people to steer His next steps away from just telling them, to SHOWING them in mighty signs of healing. Yep. He went ahead and knew that they were dust and pushed them along with every effort to have them believe, even doing so on their terms.
He loved them that much.
This morning, I stepped away from the belief in my heart that God has amazing things in store for me, and found myself in good company with the Galileans who Jesus spoke to in the above verse. I simply threw a fit because I haven't seen any sure favor yet for my writing. Or to be completely honest, I haven't seen what I have defined to be that ultimate assurance.
The cool thing is, God knows what specific signs and wonders I need to believe His will for my writing. And, as I look back, I see His little blessings along the way. Sure, they don't look like the same caliber of blessings that others around me have (in my flawed sight), but He knows what I need better than I do. Each small blessing has served its purpose in prodding me to take the next step, either by sending off that proposal, or just thanking God for the gift He's given me.
Why do I beg for MORE signs and wonders to believe in Him?
And why is He so faithful in providing them, when I constantly fall away and forget all He's done?
Throughout the Bible, we see God's people faithfully walking one moment, then royally messing up then next. We see the Israelites freed from slavery by God's mighty hand, and then we see them throwing fits because God didn't do it their way. It's humbling to know that I am no better than them, even when I have the story right in front of me to learn from!
But that's how we humans are, right? Keeping our attention on each step we take for ourselves, instead of looking up and waiting for God to work signs and wonders at His own pace.
Thank you, Lord, for revealing where I am in this vicious cycle of enjoying your blessings, then straying from you, then finding you are still with me again. Please let me hang with You HERE for a while, and protect my heart from looking down again!